Whew. That was a trip.

We intended to get going early yesterday morning but our plans were delayed when someone who will remain nameless (Yonah Yaakov Bochner) decided to hide the keys under the mini-fridge, where we discovered them after almost an hour of looking. During our hunt, Mommy got stressed out and burst into tears while Yonah had to be confined to his playpen because he kept trying to pick the half-grown oranges off of Simcha Leah’s tiny tree. By the time we found the keys and checked out of the B&B, I was ready to cry uncle.

But of course, we were on vacation and still had much to do. Our first stop of the day was to Adam and Tamar Bodenstein’s, a sweet couple around our age who own a paint-your-own-pottery place. Shuie and I decided to be artsy and try our amateurish hands at painting, and the results, I would say, were pretty good. I painted two candlesticks to use for Shabbat and Shuie painted a plate for us to put challah bread on after we cut it. Shuie’s and my approaches to art are very telling about our differences in personalities: I took one look at my candlesticks, grabbed some paint and just went for it, while Shuie spent two hours stencilling, erasing, retracing and then, finally, choosing his colors and painting. Instinct versus Intellect. While I waited for Shuie to finish, Adam and I had a long chat about the community in Tzfat and what it’s like to live there, while he rocked their newborn son, Malachi Yitzchak, in the sling. By the time Shuie wrapped up, it was mid-afternoon and neither of us had the energy to do much more exploring.

Instead, we packed into the car and headed over to Teverya (Tiberias), which we both hated the minute we arrived. Set on the Kinneret (The Sea of Galilee) the town is a strip of hotels and neon-lit stores that reminded me of so much of Atlantic City I turned the car around, lest Israeli mafiosi jump out from behind the parked cars (For the record, I hate Atlantic City. I’m using the word “hate” here). There was a tumahdik (impure) feeling in the air, which after spending the past couple of days in Tzfat, made us both super-sensitive. We made our way back northward, finally finding a rustic horse ranch/spa called Vered HaGalil (”Rose of the Galilee”), which just happened to have a little villa open with a spectacular view of the Kinneret, our own backyard and a jacuzzi, and not a neon light in sight.

We got settled in and took Yonah out to dinner at the restaurant in the main building where, while Yonah put his French fries in his hair, I enjoyed the best kosher hamburger I have ever eaten in my life. After a short visit to show Yonah the horses at the stables outside, Shuie went to get a massage at the spa and Yonah and I passed out after I put our keys away where he couldn’t get them.

We all woke up bright and early this morning. Shuie davened outside while the sun rose and Yonah played in the yard. After breakfast, I left the boys to hang out with the horses and get dirty on the playground so I could get a massage. Sadly, the therapist told me that massages for ladies less than four months pregnant are a big no-no, so I had to settle for a Reiki treatment instead, which I cried all the way through. For those of you who haven’t read between the lines yet, between my wacky hormones and missing my mother I have become an increasingly greater wreck over the past few weeks. In my best moments, I become an adorable cross between a fire-breathing spider monkey and Joan Rivers (no, they are not the same thing). My sweet, patient husband sat me down today and firmly told me that I need to get some help, so I’ve agreed to up my weekly attendance at 12-step meetings and find a grief counselor to talk to.

After a quick stop back in Tzfat to pick up our pottery, we began our trek back to Jerusalem. Between a few wrong turns and an adventure to find some gas, we finally got home 3 and a half hours later. I was happier than I thought I’d be to see the streets of Jerusalem again, especially since the inspiration of Tzfat tempted both of us to stick around longer. But I’m starting to get a sense of home here and I even know my way around a bit now after my many bus and cab rides. I was able to direct Shuie home from the center of the city, and even took myself on a solo drive tonight to Katamon and back without incident.

We are laying low this Shabbat; we cancelled our plans for guests and turned down an invitation to go away. Shuie said it best: We need a vacation from our vacation. Now, if only we could get a jacuzzi in here…